50 Questions of Life (Part 1)

So I have been sleeping for 9 days in total this month, the biggest achievement of my sleeping experience. Shouldn’t be proud, because the reason is I was sick. I was diagnosed with Variola or Cacar. Living far from home, both my dad and mom called me 5 times in a Day and I was crying all the time. The first 6 days was like a hell. All my body drained, I barely moved due to the pain and it was itchy. I’m not fully recovered yet, but at least I could sit in the front of my laptop, writing this.. after skipped classes for a week.

I realized something during this weak, that human tend to forget to take care of their health. We busy on managing things. the first 4 days of my day off, I got some people replaced my job. That’s how busy I was supposed to be if I wasn’t forced to rest by this disease. And I realized that this is a disease everyone experience at least once in a lifetime. If they survive, I survive. And however, I thank God for giving me this disease, at the very least I still managed to bear it and I know if God only gave me a one-day fever, I would be still doing all these busy things in my collage, carelessly forced my body to deal with those unstoppable works. And God loves me so much, that he gave me this disease after I finished all my papers for mid-term exam. Still have so many things to be grateful of, so I conclude that live sometime terrifies you but you got all that strengths and God always with you. So live it up!

And I didn’t really do anything in this past one month. January was my birthday but I felt like it was an ordinary day, except the surprise given by friends and gifts by my sisters. The rest was just so normal that I could forget if that was my birthday. Well..leave it here. And I haven’t watch any Running Man episodes since new year. hmm

Well I just randomly found several questions about life, and since I have been overthinking about so many things in life, including the plan of my roommate to go to Bandung until Chinese New Year which actually made me sad, then I decided to answer that several questions.

Let’s get it started…..

1. When was the last time you tried something new?

mmm… can’t even remember this one. Been doing all my things in current years, guess that I should try something new this year. Like.. traveling overseas by myself? lol this one is my actual lifetime goal.

2. What makes you want to do better?

Because I feel like I’m staying in a comfort zone for too long already, so if I couldn’t go out of this zone, I should play it better at least.

3. What do you love to do? Do you do it often? If the answer is no, why not?

Reading. Watching. MUNing. For reading, the answer is no. I don’t have much time, well lazy most of the time to start reading. Reading here I mean read a thick literature or a thick novel. Yes seems boring. But no, it is interesting only if I could find a good time in between. For Watching, I even consider to watch less movies/dramas/series this year because I need to be more productive. A typical New Year’s resolution. But couldn’t help because 2016 is a movie-attack-year. For MUNing (doing MUN, if you still don’t know, look it up on internet), I’m planning to attend 5 conferences for this year. A bit unattainable, but let’s see how far I could go for this.

4. What can you do today that you could not do a year ago?

Being a deputy of conference. USG of substance in President Model UN. Last year I was a member for both divisions, but this year I will be the one who responsible toward these divisions. I don’t know if I can do this better, or well at least or not. But I know this is something I didn’t even imagine last year.

5. Where do you see yourself in one year? five years? ten years?

I can’t see myself anywhere in one year, but I hope I see myself living a good live, having a good job, graduated from master degree, marry to a good man, having my first kid, take care of my parents and financially support my little sisters’ education in 5 years.

6. Do you like your job?

Yes, if the question is for my job in PUMUN. I love it to death.

7. What would you do different if you were reborn?

Try to have undergraduate scholarship overseas (I regret for not trying this last year.)

8. Have you done anything lately worth remembering?

Mmm.. traveling with Ivena to Semarang and almost died lol it was our first experience traveling without guidance from adult, so we just tried to adult as adult as we were. And it was a worrisome day hahaha

9. What are you excited about?

PresMUN 2016. And worry.

10. What’s your biggest problem?

Moving on. It always hard for me to adopt to a new situation. For example when I get close to particular person, I notice when they stop hitting me up. I overthink, I try to guess what makes them so and I keep on waiting that some times, they might hitting me up again. Well..pathetic and once I get attached to someone, I can’t let them go that easy. But my pride is higher than that, so even if I’m dying missing them, I won’t talk to them first. Can you see my issues. I should overcome this, this year. Hopefully..

11. When was the last time you traveled somewhere new?

Last December, to Semarang.

12. What would you regret not doing?

Choosing International Relations as my Major. Even if I could back in time thousand times, I’m still choosing this Major❤

13. What makes you smile?

You. ehm..

Well parents make me smile. Good scores make me smile. Money makes me smile. Friends make me smile. Everything matters will make me smile.

14. If the average lifespan was 50 years, would you do anything differently?

mm.. I will ask my parents to registered me into elementary school 2 years earlier, so in age of 20 I will be graduated from bachelor degree and in 25, I will be graduated from doctoral degree, have a good job and spend half of my life with my family. Once I turned 26, I will marry to a good man, and invest all my time to my new family until my life reach its end.

15. What do you want most out of life?

travel to all edge of the world, all continents, all countries and meet all people in the life.

16. What impact do you want to leave in the world?

Respect. I want to be remembered as someone that people respect. When they hear my name, they will recall all the good things and some people even take it into notes as their life’s goal. I always wish to leave the world like Nelson Mandela left the world. A wise man with respect. A man the the world would grieve over. A man that the world would thankful for.

17. What do you want to be remembered by?

Book. When I was a kid, I wanted to write a book and people will read that book whenever they miss me. Well that dream seems to be expired anyway because by years, my productivity in writing has decrease significantly. So..I want to be remembered by something I create, if it’s not a book then something. Something inspiring. Like..quote lol die Mita, die.

18. If all came back around to you, would it help you or hurt you?

Some will help me a lot. Some will only hurt me more. Well for one of my high school mate, a girl who haven’t hit me up until now because she hates me, the misunderstanding between us would never be faded if she never gives me a chance to explain. I did explain it by she didn’t read my message. So I wish that someone that will come back around is her. Because I don’t have guts to explain it anymore, because I have been doing so and she ignored me. But deep down, I miss her and we could be a very good friend if that misunderstanding never happened.

19. If you had the chance to go back in time and change one thing, what would you change?

At that night, when she told me she won’t come to the graduation day. If I could back in time, that night when she cried, I will come to her house and tell her to go to the graduation day no matter what it takes. I always regret the fact that I thought she was just being a cry baby and will not doing things that far, I thought she will come so I just let her to grieve herself on tears that night. But after that day, I never see her anymore. That was when I realized I should have come to her and tell her to come.

Because she said she will come only if I tried to tell her so.

20. What stands between you and happiness?

Money. Money always separates me from the things I love lol. It’s not materialistic, but most of things that make me happy needs money. That’s the reality.

I don’t ask my life to be as rich as Paris Hilton, but money does matter lol

21. If a doctor gave you one year to live, what would you try to accomplish?

Go to UN headquarter. And touch snow. and reading a book with chocolate and ice cream under the tree in the autumn. And tell all people that matter, I love them.

autumn-leaves-and-book

22. What do you like most about yourself?

Eyes. I always like my eyes. Because it can’t tell a lie without being obvious. Because it tells me earlier than my heart when something breaks me.

23. What do you have that you cannot live without?

If that’s a thing. It will be.. laptop and phone.

24. When you close your eyes what do you dream of?

Me in the next several years. What I will do, what job I will have. Something boring, but make me curious.

25. If you could as one person, dead or alive, one question, who would you ask and what would you ask?

To: Isaac Newton

Why?

 

 

I still have 25 more question. Guess that I will answer it on the next post lol

 

 

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